We should not give our children the impression that life depends on good grades

The school report card day has finally arrived. Well, how should parents react and what kind of attitude should parents have towards their children during this period? Dr. Suat Günsel University of Kyrenia Hospital Psychologist Feriha Kaşifoğlu has provided us with useful information about this subject:

Families wait with excitement for their childrens report card. The parents attitude and behaviour towards the child is very important during this period. Attaching great importance to grades and keeping expectations too high can lead the parents to overreact towards their child. The report card is to show the families the areas where the child is successful in or not, which area of subject needs to be supported and to guide their child to set new targets.

A child must feel that he/she is loved and supported unconditionally. Regardless of the report card, the child should be approached with a calm attitude, and parents should avoid using judgemental attitudes, excessive praise and punishments. If parents would like to reward their kids with presents, they should consider rewards that are suitable for the childs age and should not be exaggerated. However, instead of giving presents, parents could express their support by saying “ I am proud of you , I appreciate your hard work, I love you unconditionally,” which will be more effective.

It should not be forgotten that a child should not be compared with other students, every child is unique. Comparing the child with others can create anxiety and self-confidence issues.

This will raise the anxiety of both the family and the child and will adversely affect the success of the child. In order to provide a good education to the child, parents should not give the impression that life is composed of good grades.

Bad grades should not be criticized and humiliating expressions should be avoided because children will accept these labels, which will create anxiety and stress. Instead of focusing only on areas where the child is unsuccesful, it is more appropriate to consider the areas where the child is successful.
It should be kept in mind that the report card evaluates only one period of the childs education and education is a life-long process. In this context, parents should find their childs deficiencies and create future targets in order to transform failure to success. Parents should also control their expectations about their children and should not force them.

Things to do during the holiday?
For midterm break, families should make plans together, and create quality time to share together. During the holiday period, families should consider focusing on having fun and also to rest. If working parents are allowed to use their work leaves during this period, their communication with their children will increase.

Children should participate in activities such as going to the cinema and theatre, joining activities with their friends, and also creating a plan, to set a target to work daily on the subject areas which they lack, without exaggerating the working hours.

In order to start a more active second period, children should not change their daily sleeping patterns, should rest and have fun during the holidays.
Parents should not forget; their purpose in this life is not only to provide children with a good education and a good future, but also to give them joy of life.

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